oh, that is why i am in PR

"Strictly speaking, archaeologists only study the material remains left by humans while palaeontologists study the remains of all life forms. So, an archaeologist should not really set out to look for dinosaurs. But no archaeologist knows exactly what he or she is going to dig up, and archaeologists do sometimes stumble across much older remains, which they then pass on to their colleagues."

Look at your life, look at your choices...

I have been having quite a few, 'how in the hell did I get here?' moments over the past couple of weeks. I find myself in client meetings, sitting in airports, or driving across Canada and wondering to myself, seriously, how on earth did I end up in this situation?

When I was really little, I wanted to be an archaeologist. I really wanted to dig up dinosaur bones.

And yet, somehow, I ended up in PR. Just saying...

I'll admit it, I still like a show with Marc Summers - what of it?

One of the most interesting side effects of my job is that my child-like wonder with the world around me is rapidly diminishing. I am skeptical of pretty much everything.

For example, the entire time I was pregnant I REFUSED to get the H1N1 vaccine - because really, all the news stories covering the vaccine and the flu just seemed, hmmm, poorly orchestrated. They sounded like spin. They sounded like company message. And as a proud author of company message, I was bothered by the way they rolled out their 'life saving' campaign.

I have had countless conversations with my husband (who cannot even feign interest) in why some commercial or social media campaign is stupid - why they did it wrong, why it bugs me, how I would have done things differently. He nods along and as quickly as he can fast forwards through the commercials so as not to have to listen to me drone on about how asinine it is that the beginning of that anti-aging commercial says, "We didn't see this coming, but women picked us as the number one anti-aging skin product." You were shocked, you say? Why? Because you honestly kind of thought your product was crap?

Anyway, my last safe haven was the Food Network. I don't really watch much TV, but I can always have food television on as my white noise - I mean, I prefer the ACTUAL cooking shows more than the filler shows, and don't get me started on Food Network Challenge, I really can't handle that - but for the most part, everything on good ole' channel 32 makes me happy. But yesterday, I was watching this show called, "Kid in a Candy Store" which is supposed to be this random host roaming America finding unique desserts and candies. They highlighted pretzel M&Ms. I could see in my head the initial pitch the minute the segment started. I could visualize the PR team sitting around talking about how to better publicize the new flavors they were introducing. I could hear the little AAE saying, "Food Network has a call out for interesting desserts - I bet if we let them film the inside of the factory, we could be part of this show." And how unique are chocolate covered pretzels? UGH. Totally ruined.

Let me just say I can sympathize with reporters who want to speak directly with the source and have little use for me. I know I am a good guy, but I can see how they have been jaded. It has happened to me too.

I need a nap

I read a blog post the other day about the death of the blog post. It made me think about my sad, sad blog that has been woefully ignored for the past year. Here is the deal - I went to Germany, sold a house, bought a new house, worked my tail off, had a baby, taught that baby to sit up, worked a little bit more, tweeted a lot - did I mention I had a baby? those suckers are time consuming - started a baby blog, worked even more.  Whatever. There is no excuse, but dude, I have been doing other things besides blogging about work. But I think I will start again.

Just so everyone is clear on what I am working on, I am leading Bluetooth and Gemalto, playing along on ACCIONA and Nuventix and crossing my fingers pretty tight on some new business I am excited about. 

Btw - that last blog post I wrote - the one about never blogging again - that is a delightful blog post. I am so clever sometimes.

I'm never gonna blog again, guilty posts have got no rhythm...

That's right - if Seether can do it, so can I - I will 'cover' Careless Whisper to serve my own selfish purposes. That poor song just lends itself to mockery (hell, most Wham! falls into that category - but god I love it - hmmm, I wonder how many I can sneak in here...this blog post just took a very unplanned turn for the worst).

Do you have any idea how many FANTASTIC pictures of WHAM! are out there? Geez

So, last, last June, I gave you my heart - the very next day (two years later), you gave it away - so now I'm giving it to someone special. See, INK has started an official blog, freshINK, and I am now spread a little thin - and we all know I was such a posting fool to start with, huh? So now I am left to ask, if my best isn't good enough then how can it be good enough for two? I can't work any harder than I do. hmmm, that might lead you to believe I am not going to keep up both blogs, but I fully intend to. Really, just wanted to direct you over to my new baby. Plus, the rest of the INK girls are blogging (now you can meet the goofs that are always at the top of the page).

I just want to wake you up before I go-go -I am out of here kids. I know I have disappeared for more than two weeks before, but I am off on vacation and I am not tweeting, blogging, facebooking - I am taking a break from all of this social media hella-ballu. How do you know I will be back...well, you just gotta have faith. (I know, I know, that is George sans the WHAM!, but I couldn't help it)

card carrying member of NIMBY*

So, I have a little secret to tell you. I know I will be judged, hated, possibly shunned from the blogosphere - but I just have to come clean. I loathe SXSW. See how I didn't say hate? Hate isn't strong enough. I loathe it. I abhor it. I live in denial for 11 months out of the year that it even exists then I spend the majority of March with my fingers in my ears yelling, LALALALALALA!

-Picture is the stolen from Andrey Dorokhov's flickr page - this picture rocks - as do the rest of his shots.

Here is the deal, the conference, in and of itself, isn't the problem - the panels are interesting (usually), the networking is freaking incredible, and the music and film are like a little virtual cherry on top of my interactive conference sundae. But the damn thing is in my backyard. IT IS IN MY TOWN, and I therefore hate it. I like to run around Lady Bird Lake, but during SXSW it is like a punked out version of frogger - getting to the lake, dodging the hipsters, the unloading vans, the herds of folks walking to their tweet-up breakfast - it is a nightmare. I like eating at any number of Austin institutions, but the wait associated with the influx of conference attendees is more than I can bear. I like watching March Madness with Longhorn fans, not a plethora of out of town visitors determined to support their alma mater in between panel sessions and Japanese punk bands (Peelander-Z is actually kind of cool, I have to admit it). But more than all of that, I don't want to go have drinks at Scoble's party, find the show with the most celebs or gather the most foursquare points - because my husband and puppies are waiting for me at home. My desk, with all its ridiculous demands, is waiting at my office. My everyday life has to run concurrently with the show and that is a nearly impossible feat.

As usual, I whined my way through SXSW this year, missing more than I saw, participating by following along on twitter, thoroughly enjoying myself when I did venture out, but for the most part kicking and screaming the whole way. Peace out, SXSW - I'll see you next year. And I will try to work on my bad attitude in the down time.

*Not the wind one - I love clean energy

I bet lesbians love Bluetooth

I delight in Bluetooth references in pop culture - love them. Britney's horrific song Phonography (see previous post), keystone light commercials, and now, the freaking Big Bang theory is my new favorite (I can't embed the clip just yet, so you will have to click here to watch). As embarrassed as I am to admit it, I love me some Walowitz.

There are two other things about this that are interesting to me. 1) about three years ago I was facilitating an interview between Mike Foley, SIG executive director and Andy Ihnatko (Chicago Sun-Times tech journalist and all around very funny guy) when Andy announced that he felt "Bluetooth was just like Bacon - it makes everything better." Now I follow Andy on twitter, and I know he likes the big Bang Theory (seriously, how creepy for this poor guy - I swear I am not a stalker), so I am wondering if he a) remembers saying this and b) is at all pissed that this show stole his joke. I imagine he is kind of okay with it. 2) I love twitter. I really do. And I know I talked a lot of smack about hating twitter, but I have been converted - I love it now. And I loved watching all the other geeks that love twitter AND the Big Bang Theory re-quote the show last night. See here.